Day 3: Why I'm Here

Today the organization that I am working for, the APF (Association of Peasants of Fondwa) held its bi-weekly Executive Committee meeting today, which I attended as the newest member of the Committee. It was very inspiring. More on that below.

Here are some photos of the setting of the meeting:



This is the Solidarite Guest House where we had our meeting. On the steps is Sampeur, known by everyone as "Agronom", in recognition of and respect for his training as an agronomist. I learned today that he and I will be roommates in Fondwa.


The room where we met.



From the wall of the room where we met.

It's a symbolic commemoration of the date and place where the Haitian flag was created by removing the white (middle) third of the French tri-color flag. The flag is an important symbol for Haitians, who are generally proud of their country's status as the first successful slave revolt in the world, the second country in the Western Hemispere to become independent of a European colonial power, and the world's first republic founded by African-heritage people.

Removing the white stripe was obviously symbolic of Haitians achieving their liberation by removing the white people from their land. Though white people are a bit of a novelty here, Haitians are generally welcoming of people of all skin colors. African-heritage people didn't invent modern racism. White (European-heritage) people did.

OK, that's it for today's history lesson. :-)

I'm way behind on my email due to last night's cloud cover, so I'll keep this short (for me).

Today's meeting was very inspiring. I was warmly welcomed by my APF colleagues. My Creole is coming along piti piti (little by little). The meeting was conducted entirely in Creole, but my new friend and colleague, Josue, translated for me.

Here is a short video clip from the meeting:




Below is a document I created during the meeting that I think captures why I am here, working for this particular project. I think the only information you need to understand what I've written below is that the APF is a local association of peasants that for the last 21 years has been striving to create a model of democratic and sustainable development "from below"--by and for poor people.

Hopefully the rest below will explain itself, but feel free to ask questions.

Oh, one more thing. My big achievement for yesterday was getting a Haitian cell phone. In case you've always wanted to call Haiti but never knew who to call, this is your lucky day! My number in Haiti from the US is 1-509-3-842-1889. Skype is a cheap way to call.

***********************

The work of the APF (including UNIF and SEKONAPA):

Creating an international model for the world

From my point of view, the work of the APF is of great importance, for Haiti but also for the whole world, for several reasons:

1. Sustainable development is an issue for the whole world.

The work of sustainable development must be taken up by people all over the world, because the way of life in most places in the world—especially in “developed countries”—is not sustainable. The APF represents a model of ordinary people taking their problems into their own hands and creating their own solutions to those problems. This is a model the whole world needs to see. If Haiti can become sustainable, peaceful and democratic, no other country will have any excuse for not doing the same.

2. The problems of poor people must be solved because the issues of the majority of the world’s people.

The APF brings democracy, dignity, empowerment and prosperity to poor people. The majority of the world’s people are poor, so this is a critical issue for the whole world.

3. Haiti is already a model of liberation for the world. It can become a model again as a peaceful, democratic, sustainable society.

Haiti represents liberation to the whole world. Its very existence is a statement to the world that people can liberate themselves, that liberation is possible. For this reason, it is critical that Haiti succeed as a nation. Every person who embraces liberation must embrace Haiti. And every person who embraces the economic liberation of Haiti must embrace the cause of the Haitian peasants, which the APF represents very powerfully and very well. Just as Haiti lead the world by creating itself from a successful slave uprising, Haiti can lead the world again by creating a model of international cooperation and sustainable development.

For all these reasons, the APF is a model of democratic sustainable development for the whole world, and deserves to be known and supported throughout the world.

I think this is my work for the APF: to help it be known all over the world as a model of peaceful, democratic and sustainable development, and to invite support from all over the world.

My ideas for advancing the work of the APF

Step 1: Present the work of the APF to world as a model of sustainable grassroots development through world-class web site. We need to create an integrated and elegant web presence for Fondwa that very elegantly showcases the accomplishments and vision of the APF in at least four languages: Kreyol, English, French and Spanish. Eventually, we could have more languages.

Many, many people around the world would like to know about the work of the APF. We have to make that information much more easily accessible to people everywhere. The website will also be a place where we can present our needs very clearly, and make it easier for those who want to help to do so.

Step 2: Create a step-by-step manual for creating “Communities of Support” for our work (including APF, UNIF and SEKONAPA). The manual can be made available for download from the website, and can be used by people all over the world to create support groups for our work. These groups will be woven together into an international network of solidarity and support for our work.

Step 3: Promote our website and build our network of support communities. We will find ways to integrate with these communities, either by inviting them to come here or by visiting them. Each person here could be a valuable speaker and presenter about our work. We can find many allies in building international communities of support (CIW, SFA, El Salvador, EZLN, etc.).

Step 4: Reach out to major funders, with the ability to present ourselves as an model for international cooperative sustainable development.

Day 2: Humility and its evil twin

This would have been posted last night, but it was overcast here so the internet didn’t work. Really. The weather seems to effect everything in Haiti, including the internet, which comes from satellites.

Today, my second day in Haiti, was exercise in frustration and feeling like an idiot. I guess it was also an exercise in humility.

I came here with good intentions, as do many people from the U.S. who want to help Haiti. My intentions—and those of many others who try to help here—are honest and true. We want to help a country that is really struggling and suffering. And yet something is missing from the equation of me helping Haiti.

Namely, “What help do I need?”

The answer, in Haiti, is that I need help with almost everything. I don’t know what time breakfast is served, or how to ask. I don’t know how to flush the toilet. I couldn’t understand the woman who was talking to me today. The painful and harsh awakening of this day was that I want to help people who, for the most part, I cannot communicate with because I don’t know their language. Here, in Haiti, I need the help of Haitians with everything, including how to ask for help.

Haitian Creole is a wonderful language. A mix of African languages and French, it is very expressive and full of clever, colorful ways of saying things phrases. I’d love to be able to speak it. I just can’t yet. In this country of 9 million people who can, for the most part, communicate with each other just fine, I can communicate with almost none of them.

Now who needs help?

For some reason, not being able to speak to people here makes me feel like an idiot. And not a benign idiot, but a very bad person. Isn’t it strange that I would feel bad about wanting to be of help to people who, on the whole, really need help, but whose language I can’t speak? When I write it out, it seems very strange that I would feel bad about that. After all, I’ve been here about 36 hours now. Not exactly enough time to become fluent in a language. What I’ve been realizing lately is that so much of what I feel, at least sometimes, is strange like that. I seem to feel really bad about myself a lot, and for really dumb reasons.

I don’t think I’m alone in this. What things do you feel terrible about, for no really good reason?

I wish I could have come to Haiti without these strange things in my head that tell me I should feel bad about ridiculous things. As you know, there is plenty of suffering in Haiti without torturing oneself over stupid things.

Summary: I felt terrible today about not being able to speak a language I’ve never had the opportunity to learn. And yet feeling bad about myself today certainly didn’t enhance my ability to learn the language (quite the opposite). Nor did it enhance my day or anyone else’s in any way.

Conclusion: feeling bad about oneself is both stupid AND useless.

************************

A friend of mine moved to Hawaii recently. I got a message from him today that said he was feeling exhilarated after surfing for 3 hours. He said he’d found paradise.

My exact thought was:

”That’s great. I’ve found hell. Wanna trade places?”

This particular friend and I lived together last summer. We supported each other to trust our inner voices about what we wanted to do next in our lives. His inner voice told him to go to Hawaii. Mine told me to go to Haiti.

How come some people’s journeys lead them to surfing (which I’ve always wanted to do, and I LOVE Hawaii) while other people’s lead them to try to alleviate the suffering of others? I really don’t think I’m a better person than my friend in Hawaii. He’s a very good, caring person. My basic assumption is that, while people live all kinds of different lives, there is really only one kind of person: fundamentally caring and intelligent. Sure, we don’t always act that way. But I think that’s who we all are deep down inside.

Tonight I’m kinda puzzled by what seems like my obsession with being of service to those who need it the most, and doing so seemingly at the expense of myself, or at least my own comfort. This obsession of mine seems at once to have something very good about it, while at the same time being utterly bizarre, ridiculous and self-defeating.

I’m utterly baffled by this seeming contradiction within myself, and the way I make decisions about what to do with my life. And I don’t think I’ll get it figured out tonight. Feel free to send me your insights and experience about this sort of thing. Or post your thoughts under this posting.

********************************

I just had a good meeting with my boss in Haiti, Fr. Joseph. He asked me how my day was. I gave him a shorter version of what I wrote above. He said, “You’re just beginning”. Sensible guy. I love Fr. Joseph, for many reasons. Common sense and an abundance of kindness are two of them. He is a blessing, to me and many others.

He and I had breakfast together this morning, just the two of us. I don’t think I’ll ever forget the prayer he said before we ate. It was very simply and right to the point: “God, thank you for this food. Please use it to strengthen us so we can help the others.”

That’s why I’m here, and that’s why I’m working for Fr. Joseph.

In a favorite movie of mine, "Peaceful Warrior", Nick Nolte plays a wise gas station attendant who mentors a bright but foolish young man. The young man said to his mentor, “If you know so much, how come you work in a gas station?”. The teacher replied, “This is a service station. We offer service.” “Pumping gas?”, the foolish young man replies. “Service to others. There’s no higher purpose.”, replies the teacher.

Sorry, no pictures or videos with this posting. I couldn’t figure out how to take any good ones of me feeling terrible about myself, and then realizing that I’m not really terrible. :-)

Haiti: Day 1

Hi. I just got to Haiti a few hours ago.

What am I doing here? There are many answers to that question, but here's my best try.

Last fall as four hurricanes added greatly to Haiti's already-difficult situation, the separation created by my privilege as a U.S.er became unbearable. It wasn't just that I didn't feel I was doing enough to help people here (though that was true, too). I reached a point where I could not tolerate the acceptance of my privileged distance from the suffering of people here. The cost of my own physical comfort and security as a U.S.er seemed to be ignorance of and distance from the suffering of other people. In the end, this distance seemed like too high a price to pay.

So my journey is, in one part, about wanting to help heal this country. But it's also about wanting to do away with the painful distance that I feel from people who live extremely hard lives due to the forces of racism, nationalism, imperialism, capitalism, etc.


This is the view from where I wrote this.

One more thing: big thanks to all of you who have been supporting and encouraging me to do this for the last several months. You know who you are. Special thanks to Mom, Thomas, Henry and Scott. I couldn't have gotten this far with you, and am very glad I didn't have to try.

This videos aren't terribly interesting. More just a chance for me to figure out how to put video in my blog--this is new to me. Hopefully better videos will follow.


Bye for now to the Florida coast (that's Ft. Lauderdale below)


Landing at Port au Prince airport